Guys
tell sex therapists that they’d like you to act more uninhibited and
confident when it comes to sex, and to be open to experimenting to see
if different things are pleasurable for one or both of you. It goes back
to that novelty-seeking caveman brain, says Laura Berman, Ph.D.,
director of
“Variety is part of what keeps the spice alive in a relationship and
men definitely need that.” Keep in mind that your boyfriend or husband
doesn’t want you to do things you don’t enjoy—but at the same time give
at least a fleeting thought to his desires (and air yours too!), and see
what you’re both curious about, whether that’s new positions,
locations, or costumes. “Sex is about a give and take,” Berman says. “At
the end of the day, the best sex happens when you are connected and
truly open about your needs and desires.”
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