So your new sweet romance
has suddenly soured ... again. How is it possible that everything can be
going so well, and then out of nowhere, your relationship fizzles – or
worse, explodes? Well, you might be the reason for that. Case in point: half the scenes in .
(Not to point fingers, but producer Rachel Goldberg just kept ruining
things for herself.) Here's how you could be screwing things up.
1. You focus on the negative. Your boyfriend does 99 great things for you, but you just hone in on that one dirty dish in the sink. Switch your thinking and realize how those heart-eyes-inducing acts of love make you feel instead.
2. You've become bored with your routine. Humans crave new experiences. That's why a weekend escape sounds so much more appealing than rooftop drinking yet again. Sure, having a routine can be comforting, but a little spontaneity can help spark a new flame in your relationship.
3. You're not investing in yourself. It might sound counterintuitive, but stoking interests outside
of your relationship can help strengthen your connection with bae. Try
some new things on your own, like floral arranging or creative writing,
and identify as something more than "so-and-so's girlfriend."
4. Your insecurities get the best of you. Being
down on yourself and your inability to find love can quickly become a
self-fulfilling prophecy. In other words, you'll subconsciously look for
ways to prove you're unworthy so you'll think everything (even super-minor issues like when he texts back with just "K") is cause for concern. He's just busy, so stop overthinking.
5. You're uncomfortable talking about sex. Bedroom
compatibility is obviously important, but how will you know if you
haven't discussed each other's needs between the sheets? It's going to
get awkward, but it also needs to happen, so get over it like an adult
and have the talk.
6. You don't show an interest in his passions.
Even if your guy's interests seem trivial to you, it's important to
give him your attention when he's talking about them. Not only will it
be a great opportunity to connect and gain a deeper appreciation of what
your guy's into, but he also just deserves to feel like what he has to
say is worthwhile.
7. You take your partner for granted.
When people feel unappreciated, it can lead to resentment (no shocker
there), so make sure your significant other feels valued. It only takes
about two seconds to say, "Thank you," or, "I love you," but the impact
will linger for a much, much longer time.
8. You're not open to change. The
phrase "you can't change someone" sounds about right in theory, but
it's not exactly true. People do change — you just can't force
them to. The person you fell in love with is not going to be the same
person one, five, or 10 years down the road. Like you, they'll evolve,
so you can either reject change and slowly grow apart, or embrace
newness and stay together.
9. You put other people ahead of your partner. Hey,
here's a novel idea: Make your partner a priority. It doesn't matter if
it's a new guy or your better half, he deserves your attention and
time. So give it.
10. You involve too many people in your problems. Your best friend, hairdresser, coworker, therapist, and bikini waxer don't all
need to hear about your issues with your guy. The more you talk
negatively about your significant other, the more the narrative sticks
in your can inflict on your relationship.mind and the more damage you
11. You're moving too quickly.
Instead of seeing the relationship for what it is right now, you're
seeing it for what it could be in the future — and that's a lot of
pressure to put on yourself and your boo. You might overlook some
red-flag deal breakers, like if he's thinking about moving to a
different city for work, if you're too busy putting items into a wedding
registry.
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